I have had the opportunity of growing up theses last 18 months of my life. I have been away from home and have to say it has been a roller coaster of learning. I encourage high school graduates to live away from home for awhile. Not only do I encourage it, but I sort of insist on it. Living at home is a wonderful thing in which we learn a lot from family. Although I think living away from home teaches you various things, but most importantly how other people were raised and that they way you were raised may be good for your family but maybe their is a better or different way for your future family.
Having roommates, boyfriends, friends, people I didn't click off the bat with helped me soak up information about life and what I truly want. For the past 18 months I have formed opinions about life that I personally want to have and not what people want me to have. It has been a totally life changing experience and I thank Mark for that. He showed me a different way to live, not "worse" or "better" than how I was living just another way. He also taught me to not let people tell me what I should think or feel and to form my own strong opinion. When we had discussions about this, it was like he was speaking such a different language to me, I was shocked. I had been told my whole life it seemed to think this one specific way and that besides that I shouldn't think. (Not the directly, but indirectly yes) It was hard to say the least to have a total paradigm shift! I am still learning when to use my voice/opinions and not to. But as I have been hanging around with my family and various people, I have come to realize they respect me more and like to hear what I have to say. That is because I have an opinion on it, and am not just saying random things. They actually want to know what is going on in my head and appreciate what I say and give them something else to think about. They are coming to me for advice! It is very interesting how something I was terrified of, it so wonderful if used right.
I also have been realizing to make my own decisions for me, to make me happy. I don't need every girl I have ever cared for to be my braid-maid. (Sorry girls) Or that my family isn't close to certain people, doesn't mean I can't be. I am 21 (almost!) and am choosing my future and my life. I am doing things for me! I am so grateful for my family and parents to have raised me so well, and will continue to move on from here. I realize my family isn't perfect, and neither am I. But I don't want to settle for being unhappy or just middle, I am shooting for the stars. I am going to be someone to remember, someone that God wants me to be. Someone that really is close to perfect, because that is what we are all striving for, right? I love learning everyday of my life! To keep bettering myself. And where should I start? Where my Uncle Michael says most people don't. I need to put God first in my life. That is where I am starting, from the very beginning! I love my Heavenly Father and He deserves more of my time and thought! Thank goodness for a patient God.
